Birthday Fever…Don’t Call the Doctor

November 12, 2008

bdaycard_08It was the kind of high I can’t remember experiencing in recent years.  A day when no external force, person, or event could stick its chest out…take the credit for the joy I felt inside.  I had a happiness fever *smile*, temperature rising to dangerously ecstatic levels.  I was infected, and wondered, how in the world can I stay susceptible to this blissful disease.  In a word, my birthday was — Amazing.  In more than one word…

There were no cake or candles.  No happy birthday songs.  But, bottomless hugs and kisses from hubby and the kids…beautiful hand-made birthday cards, and a heartfelt card from Mama.  Love-filled shouts and texts from friends..esp. my two BFFs who both live out of state…in light of recent close relationship evaluations, my ride-or-die girls from college are rock solid…luv them man.  I took extreme joy to work on new music with hubby in the studio for hours…been toying around with the tune for a year.  I think it’sbday_metime08 really hot…and that made me happy…I may share it here for a second.  Other than that, the day was all I needed, and winded down with me stealing about 20min for myself over my fave jumbo prawn cocktail and the novel I’m currently reading, House…before picking up the kids from theatre rehearsal.  They have 10 shows in December fast approaching…oh the mommy life of raising entertainers lol.

But back to my nevertheless pure bliss…I wonder.  What makes my system build up a resistance to having birthday fever everyday.  Folks, I’m serious.  I didn’t have a care in the world.  I was soo happy.  Happy to be alive to see another birthday.  Frankly, every birthday past 2006 is monumental.  So grateful to have left the shot-calling to my Creator, ya know?  I believed…I was entitled to be happy, joyful, carefree, special, confident.  And nothing could shake it.  Nothing came close to being worthy of conjuring negative vibes in me — it was my birthday…you betta ask somebody!

So, how can I live everyday like this?  Even with nothing overtly special about the day, how can I tap into my inner being, and find a flood of love and joy waiting for me to take the plunge?  Yeah, maybe it was the little things.  Like breath.  Blessings.  The promise of promises kept and dreams to be fulfilled.  I don’t know, but I’ve gotta figure this thing out.  Cos there’s absolutely no reason for me to wait around another 365 to feel this good.  About me.  About life.  About it all.  Ashe.Selah

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