While I don’t believe things were at a ‘hate’ level, you do pose an excellent question…how does the mercury boil for something, but for the source of that thing…you’re ice cold? Interesting thought…:).

A person who hates your mum, hates you too.
(how can you claim to love something and then hate the source of that thing?)

OK. That’s enough comments on your blog already.

Will let you know about this issue as it unfolds…no doubt I’ll end up blogging about it too

First of all, thank you. I’ve been on an island with this issue wondering if other mums (as you say :-]) have experienced this.

I truly understand how it’s easy sometimes to just let things be…don’t rock the boat…start trouble. I know cos I had done that for over a year at the time. In my situation, I began to ask myself a hard question, “Who benefits from all this (my) energy/work?” And when I could not honestly find myself in the answer…ANYWHERE…I had to rediscover the truth — I am worth more, I am worth reciprocity. When you give all or nothing, you deserve all or nothing. There’s really no losing anything or anybody purposed for your life.

When I look at this scenario now, I see a pattern in me that (gratefully) had to STOP with me. I couldn’t bear for my babies to carry this same trait of low self-worth into THEIR relationships with others…Mama took the knocks so hopefully they won’t have to suffer the same. Now, I can lead by true example.

You are wise to look at your scenario from the standpoint of your kids’ ages and attachment to your friend. The older, the more challenging. My kids weren’t babies. Hubby and I sat them down and told them Amy wouldn’t be in our lives as before, and gave them a lesson in reason, season, and lifetime relationships. We made sure they knew we still love her and wish her all of God’s blessings.

‘Excess baggage’ is not fun, girl. But there’s a beautiful freedom when we finally learn to let go of the handles. It’s rough…and my prayers are with ya as God guides you in what to do in your situation…keep me posted?

Love & Blessings!

Maybe I’m also a coward for not having pushed more to fix this and now I feel in a bit of a fix cos I was saying to hubby just recently that it’s way past time to deal with this…with yet another child on the way and knowing how much they have gotten attached to my kids makes it even harder to deal with this. But it has to be done! So I’m now in the process of praying about how to talk to them again – if it means losing them completely I’ll do it…regardless of what they think of me *sigh* I need to do it before my kids become too attached too…

I agree with your feelings – you can’t allow anyone who isn’t in proper relationship with you to have that kind of relationship with your kids! Our family is so precious and that’s part of the responsibility of mums to do the right thing by our kids first, not cater to our friends needs/wants.

In my case I know I have been avoiding this and I can’t keep on. Not just for my kids sake but my own – I can’t live with a ‘fake’ relationship. It’s all or nothing! This is just another of my ‘excess baggage’ things I want to deal with this year…there’s quite a list I tell you *sigh*

Don’t know if telling you all that helps any – but your post is something I can relate to a little. Sorry I wrote so much…